Posting a photo of you on Instagram, invading your personal space, or asking for your location: consent isn’t just about touching, but all kinds of respect and boundaries. Something is only okay when everyone clearly shows that it is okay. Sounds simple — and good news: it is. Now it’s just a matter of making sure it actually happens.
In the online world, where messages and requests in group chats fly by and photos are shared in one click, consent may be more important than ever. But kids and teens often find it hard to speak up when something crosses their boundaries. And the more someone asks, the harder it becomes to say no. That’s completely normal. Kids want to fit in and don’t want to be difficult – especially not with classmates or friends. That’s exactly why it’s important that they are taught that their feelings matter, and that respecting someone else’s boundaries matters just as much.
Just a habit
What works: not presenting consent as something complicated, but as a simple habit. Consent means knowing and expressing your own boundaries — and respecting someone else’s. Easy!
Parents can keep the conversation light. Short chats work best. Ask your child how they notice when someone doesn’t want something. You can also model with your own behaviour: “I never forward anything without asking first.” That shows that respect is always the starting point. Also important: explain that a “yes” is not a contract. If something suddenly doesn’t feel right anymore, your child can always stop or change their mind.
Run a check
Go through this checklist together to make sure your child really gets it — from both sides.
1. Check before you share
Always ask first. “Can I send this? Are you okay with this?”
2. Be mindful of doubt
Hesitation, “uhm”, short replies or late replies mean someone doesn’t want it. Then you don’t do it.
3. Silence is not consent
No response in a group chat? That’s a no.
4. Is someone pushing you? Stop it.
Does someone keep asking for photos, your location, a screenshot, or to join some ridiculous challenge? “I don’t want this” is enough.
5. Location is private
Never share someone else’s location without asking first.
6. No is normal
Someone says “no”? You listen. Do you think “no”? Say it!
